You’re out with a group of friends for a night of fun—the DJ is mighty lively; the crowd is pouring in; the music is blaring—there’s definitely hope for something exciting to come your way.
The scan of the place is underway; everyone agrees to meet back in three minutes. Your phone starts to buz almost instantly—one friend’s text reads, “three, nine and twelve.” A second text arrives just seconds later; it reads: “Wallflowers: to pick or not to pick.”
To your recollection, there were a lot of great looking men—and women, for that matter—you certainly don’t remember patches of studded wallflowers upon arrival. You start to scan the outer edges of the room. Sure enough, you spot them at three, nine and 12-o’clock—all three walls were lined with incredibly hot men. Where one would normally feel a warm fuzzy feeling; a panic sets in.
Why is it that some hot, handsome men—intentional or not—have a tendency to gravitate toward the wall garden, only to become wallflowers?
Sure, women understand that wallflowers are expected at events—but not in groves. To some women, plowing through a wallflower garden is frightening enough. But to others, it doesn’t take long for the realization to hit that a date sprouting from a wallflower garden is simply far and few between.
Hopefully men by now have learned that women absolutely adore flowers—however not usually in the form of a masculine array of tall, dark and handsome arranged just so—nicely spaced along a freshly painted wall.
Well, perhaps there are a few exceptions; and unless one of those exceptions is line dancing at the Saddle Rack, there’s a definite potential dating dilemma. And Examiner women have asked how to approach these studded wallflowers when at singles events.
Of course my first thought was, what’s a sweet, intelligent, hot, sexy, and handsome man doing allowing his roots to grow next to a bare wall when he has two perfectly capable dancing feet—one right, and one left, I might add?
Some men said it is due to shyness. Some men said they don’t want to dance with a particular person and don’t know how to say no; (and some don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings so they hover to the garden for a water). Some men like to wait a little while until the music kicks up the dust a bit (they don’t want to be the first out there).
Some men said they actually like to take their time to do an assessment before approaching the Lucky One. (I wonder if they realize they could be missing out if the Lucky One was asked out by the other Passing Stud—25 minutes earlier.)
Some men said they are actually not part of the studded wallflower garden but are merely taking a break when a song comes on they can’t dance to.
Others hope that they will be asked to dance—not because of chauvinism; but more because they are just not sure the women are approachable; (the men said more and more people go out in groups these days, and don’t always ‘appear’ to want to let others in—it can actually send mixed signals, making them appear unapproachable).
Not to completely defend studded wallflowers—(although throw in a hit from the The Wallflowers and who wouldn’t be a fan; their music is incredible)—the studded wallflowers made some pretty good points for occasionally hanging at the wallflower café.
So ladies, although wallflowers do have the potential of growing roots and becoming root-bound, there are those that are just holding up the wall for a moment; or that are only there for a little sunshine, smile and a breather. Wallflowers are just as hot, handsome, intelligent and sexy as the anyone, so cut them a little slack.
And to answer the question, ‘Wallflowers: to pick or not to pick’ –yes, absolutely roam the wallflower garden; and please do pick one (or more)—and enjoy the dance.
As always, the best of luck in your dating ventures and for goodness sakes, don’t take life too seriously, smile and have some fun.
“To laugh often and love much… to appreciate beauty, to find the best in others, to give one’s self… this is to have succeeded.” –Ralph Waldo Emerson
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