Family; In human context, a family (from Latin: familiare) is a group of people affiliated by consanguinity, affinity, or co-residence. In most societies it is the principal institution for the socialization of children. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Family
The core of human existence manifested itself through the family unit expansion. With the joys of living you also encounter daily drama that often leaves you baffled, drained, and looking for a way to resolve the problems or run from them.
This past week I had the privilege of hearing an excellent teaching at Cornerstone Church. Pastor Georgina De la Mora spoke on drama. She got right to the point, humans often create some of their life’s problems through unhealthy decisions making. Pastor De la Mora directed the teaching on relationships, signs of a good relationship, signs of an unhealthy relationship and how to avoid a whiner and chose a winner. I really enjoyed her presentation. The points she made were clear. She identified the red flags of a whiner and also identified what a winner is. I went as far as asking her for permission to use her teaching materials and reference them in my week’s article. She generously agreed, so in continuing this series on family strengthening and maintenance, the discussion will identify behaviors and traits that are beneficial, and those that are big red flags.
Delayed gratification; When a person grows up in a family unit with chaos, it’s likely that person may grow addicted to the chaos, even create the chaos at times. In fact, for such a person, it could really feel boring without the chaos and crisis. Despite chaotic living being unhealthy for you, if you’re addicted, you may create drama subconsciously or at times consciously just to accomplish what ever agenda is necessary. Have you ever heard negative attention is better than none? Well it’s true for some, the outcome justifies the means. Despite the risk taking and the terrible consequences people face from bad decision making, if a person does not take the time to reflect and change that risky decision making, than it’s likely they set themselves up for failure over and over.
People often look for short cuts in life and end at dead ends. When this becomes a normal behavior, the person likely has traits of being addicted to drama. The end result is always the same, that person likely is stuck in the cycle of bad decisions making. The reason I decided on a series of Family Strengthening is because as humans, our reference point is our childhood, adult experiences and the patterns we learned growing up. Sometimes despite a great family and great examples, some people just make of themselves a mess through bad decision making. When this red flag pops up, and the person is seeking excitement and living on the edge of danger just to fill the emptiness and boredom, it’s could be a sign of an underline depression or anxiety. Genetics can also play a role in being predisposed to anxiety, depression or other behavioral decision making that may require short term or long term care. Personally, having a strong spiritual life brings a balance to your life. Good advice should always include taking care of you as a whole person, body, soul and mind.
The truth is seeking help and maintaining your wellbeing through the proper medical or behavioral health care intervention can make a big difference in your thought process, decision making and in helping eliminate some of the consequences, chaotic living causes. Remember when you make decisions that are good or bad those decisions also impact those who love you. Maintaining healthy family practices and strengthening your own healthcare or behavioral health care, while establishing a spiritual life, will also benefit the family unit, Whether it’s bad relationships, drug abuse, risky behaviors or poor communication, Family strengthening and maintenance should be practiced for life. Your Family and life should be your number one commitment, start today, take inventory and help your family thrive.